Sometimes, A Calling Is Better Than A Choice

Vulnerability is not winning or losing. It's having the courage to show up when you cannot control the outcome.

For once, I have no topics to start writing this blog about, so it would be fascinating to see what comes out in the following words. Sometimes, the feeling that you can leap and the net will appear is so strong that you have no choice but to leap. Isn't that wonderful? Because then you don't have to spend hours deciding whether you should leap or not, pros and cons of the decision, sometimes using tarot cards online to see if you can get an answer or speak to dozen people to see if there is any advice or journal forever in case something jumps at you.

Don't get me wrong, choosing to do something is much better than feeling like you have been forced into it. But calling rather than a choice is just much easier. I can only recall a handful of situations where the calling was so strong that I had no choice but just one option. Even that one option was not a piece of cake; it was the only path I had. It was physically impossible for me to do something else.

One was marrying my husband - the first 'love' marriage in my conservative Hindu family. Not only was I marrying someone who was not my caste, but someone who was of a different country altogether. I still remember the feeling in my body when I knew very clearly that I couldn't marry somebody else, so much so that I was ready to face my extended family. The family who have always doted on me and indulged all my desires, which I suspect led me to believe that I could get away with it.

Always make decisions that prioritize your inner peace.

The other was actually going to the London Business School, where I met my husband. Now, that was a case where I had no choice. Let me explain. So, I was working in Phoenix, Arizona, and my office did not give me enough vacation to go to India. I had friends in London, and it was only an eight-hour flight instead of thirty-six hours. So, I booked a flight to London. I was supposed to meet my friends at Regent's Park, but they were late, so I decided to visit London Business School, which was right behind me and fell in love. Yes, there was something attractive, and I knew it was the school for me, even though a part of me thought it would be a miracle if I could go into a prestigious school like LBS. So, when I returned to Phoenix, I decided to apply to LBS and combine it with the fact that my parents were looking for a guy; I could not find a better solution. When I told my dad I was applying to LBS, he said if you are doing the work, you should apply to other schools - his logic made sense, so I applied to twelve schools - ten in the US, one in India and one in LBS. Of course, here is the kicker - I got rejected from all the schools in the US, got into LBS and was waitlisted for the one in India.

There are a couple more examples where I could not - not do that. It will be interesting to see how they pan out and if they really are a calling or a choice. I am grateful that I have had those experiences because they changed the trajectory of who I was to become. In some ways, they led me to have a strong personal locus and my vision: ' To be a better version of myself every day and inspire others to do the same.'

Do you have similar experiences where what you did was not a choice but a calling?